best man

stag do

Gentleman assemble – how to organise an epic stag do, a best man’s guide

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So you’ve found yourself at the helm as the best man or you are the groom and leading from the front yourself. Now it’s time to organise an epic stag do ahead of the wedding day. It’s your job to pull together a great team of lads, create epic memories, stitch the stag up nicely and ultimately organise the best stag do you can. This will also offer perfect material to form the basis of some great best man speech jokes down the line (and of course some which shouldn’t make the cut!) Now its time to organise an epic stag do to send the main man off in style. Make sure it goes off without a hitch by following these simple pointers. Work out the guest list for the stag do Spend time with the groom to work out who they would like to invite on their stag do. Start by drawing up a list of names and contact numbers/details. This will include close friends, family members, work/uni mates, in laws and so on. If you are travelling abroad, bear in mind that you may have two events – one away and one locally. The chances are you will want your closest friends (and party animals) along for the foreign do, whilst the wider circle of friends will make it to the local event.  Have a rough list for both, or invite everyone to both events. Inevitably cost and availability will whittle the numbers down accordingly. Just having one stag do in your home country? Then identify who the stag would like to invite, then get the invites out and confirmations early on. Now your set. Decide the location of your stag do Choose your location wisely. Has the groom given an indication of where he’d like to go? Will you be having a local and a foreign do?  You will need to play to the crowd and the stags wants here, using a sprinkle of your own imagination and initiative.  Popular stag do locations in the UK include these tried and tested destinations: Leeds Bristol Newcastle Bournemouth Edinburgh Cardiff London Nottingham Brighton Liverpool Manchester Newquay All of the above will offer plenty of activities and great nightlife. Bear in mind however, prices may vary depending on where you go. If you are looking for alternative stag do ideas in the UK – read this for some inspiration. Thinking of further afield? You can’t go wrong with the following stag do locations in Europe and further afield: Budapest Prague Hamburg Tallinn Krakow Amsterdam Berlin Dublin Riga Barcelona Bratislava Madrid Las Vegas As above, the prices will vary significantly from country to country so put in a bit of research first.  For example – pints in Prague will cost around a £1 each compared to Dublin where you are looking closer to £5-6 per pint, so choose your destination wisely. Remember the critical components here: price of booze, quality of women, activities and nightlife. For an in-depth analysis of European locations, find out more at Pissups review of their top 7 European locations in 2019 here. Consider the stags budgets when organising the stag do Keep money in mind for your stags. This can be one of the main bones of contention, so give a realistic idea of costs from the outset to cover the key elements including travel expenses, accommodation, activities and any extras early on.  It’s also a good idea to provide a rough estimate of living expenses or extra costs to budget for. These will include food, booze and anything else you may have planned. Try to get an idea of the stag do costs as early as possible to allow the stags ample time to save or decide if it’s not for them.  Nobody likes repeatedly being asked for extra money as costs escalate, so try to give a realistic idea from the off to reduce any problems later on. This is a big treat for you all, so you want everyone on the same page from the beginning and don’t want to be scrimping when you get there. Get the invites for the stag do out early We are all busy people right? People like as much notice for big occasions as possible, especially when you’ve got to save, take time off, get the other half to agree… or organise childcare. Once you’ve got the stag do date and location decided – get the invites out as early as possible. This will allow you to gage numbers – and once you ask for deposits – identify serious contenders. It’s up to you if you offer a few potential dates for the crowd to decide. However, this can cause challenges and it is always difficult to please everyone. Get a consensus of availability, pick your date, get confirmations and think about getting it booked early on. Then you can relax safe in the knowledge you’ve got a big weeekend of fun on the horizon! Getting to the the stag do – planning and logistics The boring bit. To ensure your epic stag do weekend runs smoothly, make sure you do the hard yards beforehand and begin your preparations and planning early on. Make sure everyone has the travel plans, lifts arranged, times and dates. Check if there are any visa requirements for your location. Give the boys a nudge to check passport dates are valid and mention any kit it might be worth taking if you have specific activities planned (or to take swimmers if there is a pool or hot tub nearby.) Then ensure you have each other’s contact details in case someone gets separated from the group so you don’t leave a man down in an unfamiliar city, or share your locations on your phones to stay connected. Enlist your most organised friends to help with any details and keep this on track. Remember the old boxing adage: train hard, fight easy – and apply this to the planning and delivery of an awesome stag do.

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best man duties

What does the best man do – the ultimate best man duties checklist for the wedding

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Congratulations, you’ve been chosen to be the best man. Make no mistake, this is a major honour that sets you ahead of the rest as one of the most important members of the wedding day. You will be Robin to the grooms Batman, a shoulder to lean on in the build-up to the big day and a whole lot more. Importantly; as the groom’s right-hand man, your delivery of best man duties for the wedding should aim to go above and beyond expectations. But never fear, with our ultimate best man duties checklist you will hit the ground running with all bases firmly covered. But what are the best man duties? Read on as we break down exactly what being a best man entails. What does the best man do – your expected duties As the best man, you will be expected to be a person to rely on in the build up to the big day. Cool headed, pragmatic and someone with a helpful word to offer in the fraught and often stressful times that can lead up to a wedding. Once you have been officially appointed to your role, one of your first major tasks will be to co-ordinate the stag do. This will involve researching and identifying an appropriate location and activities that the groom will love. You will then need to co-ordinate family and friends old and new to attend. A man of action, on the wedding day your best man duties will include helping to co-ordinate the groomsman, greeting guests and most importantly delivering an awesome and fitting best man speech to send your best friend into married life in (slightly bruised) style. This role is not to be understated; you will be responsible for delivering possibly the most important speech of the three main speakers on the day. Who is usually chosen as the best man at a wedding – finding your wingman The best man is usually a close friend or male relative of the groom. This could be the groom’s best friend from school, university or college, long time best bud, dad, or brother. The role comes with a lot of responsibility and demands that will require several key skills.  The best man should be a good communicator, organiser, adviser, and man of the world. The perfect best man will embody all these traits and more. If you are the groom, consider your choice wisely. As the main man, ensure your best man is a suitable match to deliver an epic stag do and speech that will truly do you justice. Still not decided? See our full guide to choosing a great best man here. Can there be two best men at a wedding? This is the 21st century gentleman, which pretty much means you can do whatever you like! Of course, you can. Two best men are quite common at weddings, and sometimes even three get called to do the best man duties. By employing two skill sets it will help to play to their individual strengths and split the workload through the organisation stages. Pulling together an unruly crowd of stags can cause fatigue in even the most energetic of organisers! Then when it comes to the speeches, you have two friends to work together and deliver something special. Whether its one, two or three best men; our best man duties checklist will guide you through the important tasks to get the most out of the wedding day. What does it mean to be the best man? It means sir, you have been chosen as the cream of the crop to assist your best friend with one of the most memorable and significant days of their lives. It’s a true honour to be asked, and something as a man you will be able to tick off your life bucket list. Take the job seriously. Pay attention to the best man duties checklist and plan ahead to fulfil your duties with style. Best man duties for the wedding day Being the best man involves several duties and responsibilities. It will be up to the bride and groom how they delegate duties in the build up and on the day.  Most commonly you will be expected to organise an epic stag do, help with preparation duties such as collecting and returning suits etc, delivering a fantastic speech and looking after the rings as a minimum. For a more thorough breakdown, see our list below: The ultimate best man duties checklist What are the best man duties? These are some of the best man tasks that may be required of you: Planning the stag do Write and deliver a fantastic best man’s speech Look after the wedding rings Help with the collection and return of the wedding suits Assist with greeting the wedding guests Organise the wedding cars Be the point of contact to co-ordinate the ushers/groomsman on the day Co-ordinate a gift to the groom from the best man and groomsman Spend the night before the wedding with the groom Help the groom to get ready on the wedding day Help to co-ordinate the guests for group photos Deliver key announcements such as the first dance and cutting of the cake (in the absence of a master of ceremonies or toastmaster) Sign the wedding registration as a witness (if required) Assist in the setup of the venue and collection/return of items Key responsibilities – read on as we break down a few of the key responsibilities further: Planning a stag do This is often the jewel in the crown of the best man duties. Organising the stag do is one of the main responsibilities of the best man. You will need to chat to the groom to gather ideas of where and when they’d like to go, and what sort of activities he would like to do when you get there. Some of this you will take upon yourself, but make sure you have a good idea of the grooms’ tastes

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a best man speech

The best man speech – 11 steps to effortlessly write a great best man’s speech in less than 24 hours

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Congratulations, you’ve been picked to be best man! But what does the best man actually do, how do you structure a best man speech and what should you include? Hold on tight gentleman and read our top tips on writing the ultimate best man’s speech to cement your legendary status to the other guests. Setting the scene So picture this. Your best mates wedding is closing in and you’ve been asked to be best man. You’ve already organised an epic stag do. Now the big day is approaching and it’s time to think about writing the best mans speech. Congratulations and good luck. The best man speech is often the highlight of the three main speeches (father of the bride, groom and then best man.) Whilst the others will feature a degree of comedy, they are largely devoted to the bride and history of the couple. The best man speech however needs to be funny, entertaining, and worthy of your best pal. All eyes will be on you to deliver a good one that is fitting of the groom to send him into married life in style.  But don’t stress, with our top tips on how to write your best man speech you’ll breeze through it. Hold tight and get that pen and paper at the ready! 1. Write down initial ideas of what to say First up try and get some ideas down on paper of things that stand out about the groom and/or your relationship to each other. Are there any particular stories that stand out about the groom and are worthy of the best man speech? Consider how long you’ve known each other, the background to your relationship and whether there are any major (or funny) slip ups he’s made over the years. How has he changed since he met the bride (keep this positive with a mention of how he’s punching above his weight!). Draft some ideas that you think will be promising. This will act as a framework to tie your speech around. Think about how you will structure the best man speech working from your introduction (and ice breaker), through to the main anecdotes and stories, serious heartfelt points (if any!), toasts, and then finally how you will close the speech. Do a read through, check the timings and how it flows then tweak as you see fit. If you have a trustworthy partner or friend, take advantage, and use them as a sounding board for your ideas. They will be your reference to determine if they work well or are inappropriate. When planning your main content, don’t forget to consult other friends and relatives for great stories and anecdotes about the groom that you could include. 2. Consider the audience So you want to give the groom a good ribbing, but is that story about Amsterdam, the stag do or the festival and the nefarious activities you got up to fitting? Consider the bride and grooms parents and close family will be there. Bear in mind the whole audience for the best man speech and determine your stories and jokes appropriately. Think more PG-13 than X-rated. Don’t kill all the fun from your speech but judge the content wisely so the audience don’t become too uncomfortable. Remember to never reference previous girlfriends/relationships of the groom or over emphasise if he has had a lot of luck with the ladies previously (no bride wants to hear too much about his previous girlfriends.) But if he hasn’t go for it – in a nice way (and not too crude way of course)!  Your best man speech hasn’t got to be a laugh a minute, and don’t let the groom off, but ride that knife edge wisely.  The key to a good best man’s speech is to teeter close to the edge of acceptable mick taking without falling off it. Think a punch in the arm, rather than a karate kick to the face. You’ve got this! 3. Research  If you are adept at writing speeches or speaking to a crowd, then you may be quite comfortable coming up with a suitable best man speech straight off the bat. On the other hand, if you’re struggling or need some inspiration, do your research online for some introductory best man jokes and structure for the best man speech. Be careful not to copy too much from what you find online however. We have attended weddings and heard the same icebreakers and jokes on 2 or 3 consecutive occasions. This is an easy way to undermine the integrity of your speech.  Used sparingly, a few key one liners and jokes taken from the web can be useful as good icebreakers to work into the speech or to bookend the start and finish.  These can be a handy addition to a funny and entertaining best man’s speech. 4. Speak to the room and make eye contact  Don’t be the best man that has his eyes pinned down to a crumpled sheet of A4 for the whole speech mumbling his way through. This won’t do yourself or the groom justice.  Unless you have experience in public speaking it will undoubtedly be nerve wracking (fingers crossed the wedding speeches are before the food so you can enjoy it!) Methods of reducing anxiety can be to familiarise yourself with the venue (this could be worth a timely visit beforehand.) Practise reading and performing it all the way through and be confident.  Again, take advantage of your confidant here. Most importantly, remember to speak slowly and clearly. Leave pauses at the right times for laughter and enjoy your moment in the limelight. Once the best man speech is complete, you are home free! Check out these tips to improve your public speaking. 5. Practice makes perfect  Following on from above, sometimes aspects of a speech or public performance will look great on paper but when read out loud don’t flow properly. Sentences might be too long. There might not be sufficient pauses, or your main points

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wedding speeches in order

Your essential guide to wedding speeches – who does them and in what order

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Traditionally wedding speeches play a huge role in the wedding day. These are usually looked forward to with great anticipation by the guests, whilst potentially filling the designated speakers with dread! If you are starting to think about the wedding speeches and wondering who does wedding speeches and in what order we’re here to help. Wedding speeches in order There are traditionally three main speakers. The order of the key wedding speeches is as follows: Father of the bride Groom Best man In recent years, some couples have moved away from traditional formats, and there are no hard and fast rules as to who does wedding speeches. You may choose to take a more relaxed or unusual format. Additional speakers may also include the bride, bridesmaid/maid of honour or other important guests. It’s your day, so you can tweak the order of the wedding speeches and who does wedding speeches to reflect you as a couple. If you are one of the lucky guests giving a speech, planning ahead and knowing the do’s and don’ts of your wedding speech will make your life considerably less stressful in the run up to the big day. Who manages the wedding speeches on the day? To facilitate the speeches smoothly and efficiently and to avoid any messy gaps, there are a few options for your wedding day.  You may wish to appoint a trusted and appropriate guest to manage the introduction and announcement of the wedding speeches.  Ensure that the appointee is confident in public speaking or has had experience in such a role previously. This will help smooth the transition between speeches considerably.  Alternatively, depending on your venue, there may be a representative who manages this for you. You may also consider employing a master of ceremonies (MC) for the day. An MC will ensure timings run smoothly and run to plan throughout your day. They will also offer some flair to proceedings. Finally, ensure all speech makers know the order and are familiar with the plan beforehand. This will help to avoid any untimely toilet breaks and awkward handovers! Who does the wedding speeches and what should they include? Father of the bride The father of the bride would traditionally give the first speech as in days gone by, they would usually be the ones to host the wedding. Wedding speeches in order: First Key points: Welcomes the guests and thanks them for attending Welcome the groom to the family with warmth, recalling first impressions and early relationship nerves Mention the key people in the brides life, giving a voice to those who wont be speaking Tell stories from the brides childhood and growing up i.e. ambitions, driving lessons, memorable moments Toast to absent friends Remember: Keep it entertaining and formal Don’t make it a dry list of thank yous and don’t go overboard on praise for your daughter Don’t make it too long (there’s at least two more speeches to go!). 6-8 minutes is fine. The Groom The main man himself.  A good start to the groom speech is to thank the father of the bride for his speech and the bride’s family for welcoming you. Don’t forget to compliment your new bride on how beautiful she looks. Wedding speeches in order: Second Key points: Thank the guests for attending and for their gifts Thank you and presentation of gifts to key members of the wedding party including the parents of the bride and groom, best men and groomsman, maid of honour and bridesmaids Thank both sets of parents and toast the brides parents if they are hosting Recall your story – how you met, what were your first impressions, what was the first date like, what you fell in love with (keep it to the point and don’t waffle) Sprinkle the speech with humour and don’t make it too sentimental Finish with how lucky you are and how much you love your new wife before a final toast (and perhaps add in not to trust a word the best man says about you!) Remember: Don’t forget the toasts and thank yous Don’t go overboard with the superlatives amazing, beautiful, fantastic. Remember less is more to give the compliments greater impact Best Man This is the big one and finishes off the three main speeches. There is a lot of pressure for the best man to be funny and entertaining, so don’t forget to add in some great best man jokes. Wedding speeches in order: Third Key points: Follow the grooms toast by thanking the bridesmaids and complimenting the bride Compliment the couple Tell anecdotes and stories about the groom. Don’t let the groom off lightly, but also bear in mind the audience i.e. humiliation without being X-rated Keep it simple and don’t try too hard. Use the tried and tested format: ice-breaker, introduction, main stories and laughs, serious heartfelt points and final toast Get your timings right – not too short (under 5 minutes) so it feels you haven’t done the groom justice and not too long (over 10 minutes) so guests start to lose attention.  Between 6-10 minutes is fine. Checkout our guide to writing a best man speech here. Remember: We’ll say it again – remember your audience. Think how the groom’s gran would receive the jokes. If it’s likely to be stony silence, tone them down a bit. Don’t let one period of the grooms life (i.e. adolescence or university) dominate the whole speech. Also don’t go overboard on ‘in jokes’ that no one else will understand. Don’t mention the ex. Previous girlfriends are a big no no. By all means roast the groom on his lack of success with the ladies, but don’t mention it if he’s had considerable luck. The bride WILL NOT appreciate this. Don’t be too harsh. Mild humiliation and lots of laughs – yes.  Hang your head in shame humiliation – no. He is your best friend after all. Find out what other best man duties to expect and how

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choosing a best man

Finding your wingman – top tips for choosing your best man

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The grooms wingman, second in command and person responsible for delivering an exhilarating, funny and suitably apt speech for the main man. So how do you choose your best man for the big day? Here are some of our top tips to choose a great best man for your wedding day. Alongside the groom, the best man is up next (arguably ahead of the father of the bride) as the next most important man of the day. If you’ve read our wedding traditions post, in days gone by you’ll remember the best man was literally chosen as the best swordsman to defend the couple from any troublemakers on the day. High responsibility indeed. And for grooms once you’ve popped the question – this will be one of the most important choices on your wedding planning journey. As your second in command on the big day, your number 2 will help you hold it together through the emotional rollercoaster ahead. Knowing you have a calm and reliable side kick throughout the planning and the nuptials really will help. As such, it cares to put a bit of thought into choosing your best man. The Robin to your Batman, Rodney to your Delboy or Penfold to your Dangermouse. The best man is the best friend who will join you at the front of the alter before your wife (or husband) to be comes strolling in. Make no bones about it, this is a high pressure job and you need a fine chap who can rise to the occasion and help the day run smoothly (without outshining you!) Who should your best man be? First off, it may be worth identifying a list of contenders. The shortlist may include your dad, brother, best friend from school, uni pal or your partner’s best friends husband aka your new best mate. As far as your father and brother go – unless you want to highlight your bond for a particular reason or they are truly your best friend, they will already be fairly prominent on the day (with your brother lined up as an usher.) Instead it may be nice to consider one of your friendship options instead. Speeches work well written by a close friend who knows your best (and worst) sides. But as with everything for the day, this is up to you. To help choose, it is of course worth considering the responsibilities and obligations they will be expected to carry out as part of the best man duties.  Your best friend from school Stevo may be the life and sole of the party. But if after a couple of beers and a round of Jager bombs, he descends into drunken oblivion – he may not be the chap you want slurring away and dishing out all the juiciest stories from that distant weekend in Amsterdam to all of your friends and new family.  Your best man is going to be your head cheerleader before and during the day. With power comes great responsibility, and you need someone who is going to pull you through in style. Stuck between two choices of best man? Why not have two – we’ve seen that grooms are now regularly choosing a couple of best pals for the top job.  This could iron out any competition between friends and could also benefit the day by taking advantage of their different skill sets. What are the responsibilities of the best man? Before the big day Your best man will be expected to organise and pull together your friends and male family members to create an epic stag or batchelor do. This could be at home, abroad or both.  The man in question will need to have good communication and organisational skills to pull this off.  The aim here is to create lasting memories with lots of hijinks you will laugh about long after the day. (Ideally without anyone ending up having to call the British consulate from an eastern European jail.) Bear this in mind when choosing your best man. Leading up to the big ‘I do’ Just before the big day, your best man may ease your nerves with a couple of drinks the night before (just a couple, mind). On the day as you step ‘into the breach’.. the best man will help you get ready on the morning as the groomsmen assemble. You will then entrust him with the rings ahead of the big ‘I do’.  From then on the best man will be the Robin to your Batman as you nervously await the moment of truth. He will help to greet your guests, gather friends and relatives for pictures after the ceremony and step in as the go to guy to iron out any small problems. Once the formalities are out of the way, either before or after your wedding breakfast, all eyes will be on the best man to deliver the key note speech of the day.  Bear in mind, this is THE ONE that all your guests will be looking forward to. You want someone who can skilfully hold guests in the palm of their hand as they wax lyrical about how great you are/how little joy you had with ladies before you met your lovely wife and a number of cringey stories that will leave guests in fits of laughter.  This takes some skill, and as you – hopefully – only want one of these speeches, you want the best man to do you justice. Best friend or not, if your pal struggles to string together a sentence when in front of a crowd, you may want to reconsider his part for this role when choosing your best man. After the ceremony Once the speeches are out of the way, the main gig may be over but the best man should still be there to watch your back throughout the rest of the day. They should continue to help take care of any operational headaches dealing with venue staff,

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